Tillitonse - A Transformational Journey Together

We talked about our pains, our complexes, our dreams.....and shared JOY! It's been a roller-coaster 24 hours attending a high school reunion to mark 30 years since we graduated. Was hesitant to attend, but a few folks who cared, nudged me to come. And boy, am I glad I did! My wonderful conversation with Sandhya epitomised everything that was so right about this experience. This was probably the first time we had ever spoken beyond the typical desultory conversation. It was so moving, energising and ultimately joyful to hear how this fine lady had conquered her demons and was now blossoming. Inspirational!!! So, to my friends out there, the next time you see me, lets get beyond the 'how u doing?" to the real you. I am VERY interested!

GOOD NEWS AND BAD NEWS - TREAT THESE TWO IMPOSTERS THE SAME By 8am this morning, I had been hit by these two imposters! As I awoke at 5am and got ready to leave for my early morning yoga class, I made plans to visit my extremely cute grand-niece Samara who turned 5 today just after class. Spending time with Samara and her equally adorable sister Anika are always huge learning and exhilarating experiences. The sheer unbridled joy that emanates from them (and most kids) is infectious and when with them, one can totally just be in the moment. And that's indeed how it played out. Spending time this morning with these two munchkins was indeed all that and more. When I got home, I heard a 'ping' on my phone and when I opened my email - this message about someone one I know came through.... (names and some details changed) To those who are good friends of X,  I am really overwhelmingly sad to tell you X has only a few weeks to live according to his recent medical...

10. Gratitude For The Winds That Help Me Fly And finally, to be able to make such an awesome trip from Bangkok to Banaras and then to the ashrams of the Bihar School of Yoga is indeed a privilege.   I am indeed fortunate to have an awesome set of people around me who allow and support me to enjoy these journeys.  My two fellow monkeys Divya and Shantanu are right up there. Shantanu works selflessly to conceptualize, organize and execute a wonderful experience . Working on the logisitics, coordination with the Ashrams to request for special classes and wonderful interactions and managing the multiple questions (and egos) that we, the trip participants, throw at him is a thankless task. He does this with a sense of calm and purpose that are inspiring. Divya is my catalyst. She calls me on my bullshit and nudges me in the right manner to keep me going.   I am indeed fortunate that this wonderful couple a...

9. Disconnect to Connect I cannot stress the importance of taking time off just be by yourself on a regular basis. Over the past few years, I have been getting away on my own and just finding the time and space to quieten my mind. Even two days are enough. Further, by not checking emails or social media, one can truly begin the process of connecting with one-self. Over a 1000 emails and Whatsapp messages welcomed me back. It only took a brief few moments to cut through the chaff. We tend to think that we cannot afford to disconnect from the world outside.  But it’s quite humbling on one hand and liberating on the other to know that you and the world can exist without each other quite nicely!

8. Devotion (‘Bhakti’) is More Than Blind Faith Paying for a VIP pass to get a special ‘darshan’ (view) in a temple and other similar practices where we contaminate the purity of introspection and devotion irk me. So, when I heard Sw. Niranjan at the Bihar School of Yoga give the following interpretation of ‘Bhakti’ (devotion), it gladdened my heart. Bhakti is not about rituals. It is about identifying  a higher order value/person and then constantly remembering this ideal as one goes through the acts of a regular day. Just like a mother who while going through her multiple chores, is connected to what he child is doing, similarly, the highest form of Bhakti is to remain connected to a higher good (this need not be a person, but a value we hold up).  This constant remembrance (‘smaran’) allows for us to have a relationship with this higher value and leads to living our life by these ideals resulting in increased peace and liberation from...

7. Yes, Our Gods Inhale! So there I was on the banks of the Ganga in Banaras, among the most holy spots for Hindus and I saw it – Painted on the wall was Lord Shiva – one of the three most revered Gods. Yup, there he was, looking cool and relaxed as he inhaled. Indeed the grass was greener on his side! This ‘accommodating’ aspect of Hinduism has always fascinated me. We are totally fine with our gods smoking grass, having multiple spouses, cheating and lying, getting drunk on one’s own ego (in addition to the benevolent actions of course)  – basically all the natural human tendencies. On the other hand, ever so often, there arises a puritanical trait (often aimed at curbing women’s liberties).  The ability for contradictions to exists, nay thrive, are quite amazing! I guess this is indeed a metaphor for how we live our lives.  But for now, let me just inhale as well and BE AT PEACE…..MAAAN!

6. Faith Amidst Life Unfolding – On the Banks of the Ganga in Banaras One of the most peculiar aspects of Hinduism is how the places of worship are not ‘islands of tranquility’ like those you would see in a church or a mosque. Instead, like most things in India, they are truly integrated into the chaos of life surrounding it. I spent a day walking by the ‘Ghats’ (riverside steps) of the Ganga in Banaras and it was quite amazing to see how practices of faith co-existed in harmony with more mundane daily acts – like washing and drying clothes, playing cards, getting a shave and cleaning cattle and humans. There is a part of me that has always identified with the quiet associated with places of worship of the more mono-theistic religions. Indeed, the Hindu temples seemed way too chaotic for any reflection and devotion. But, on the banks of the Ganga, as I strolled though on a quiet day enjoying gorgeous weather, it was mo...

5. Ask Believe Receive – Amazing how this works One of the most amazing insights that was reaffirmed during this trip was how when one really wants something and believe that we deserve to have it, the universe does indeed make it happen. What I further learnt in this trip was that if the environment around you is positive and conducive, then this is even more likely to happen. Maybe this has to do with our minds being more focused in such places. On numerous occasions during this trip in the tumultuous yet holy city of Banaras and the tranquility and grace of the ashrams of the Bihar School of Yoga, I found myself receiving what I asked for. Here are two examples: 1.      The ‘Hindu’ slant of the ashram has always left me a little uncomfortable. After all, by highlighting certain Hindu practices and rituals were we not excluding those from other faiths? I wanted to ask Sw. Niranjan, but the chance did not arise. One afternoon as I was sitti...

4. THE PURITY AT THE SOURCE I have been actively practicing ‘yoga’ for the past four years. Initially, whenever I asked my teacher Shantanu about what I should do more to progress faster on the esoteric (non-physical) elements of yoga, his stock response was ‘spend time at the Ashram.’ This used to infuriate me at times.   The ashram he referred to was the Bihar School of Yoga (BSY)– almost a 16 hour journey each way utilizing multiple transportation modes! BSY has two main ashrams – both in back of beyond places. They strongly believe that to maintain the purity of their teachings, a conducive environment is absolutely essential. Therefore, if one wants to learn yoga taught the BSY way, one has to indeed go there. The focus is on ensuring the purity of yoga teaching rather than on mass dissemination. Over the past four years, I found myself making these trips with increased enthusiasm. Last week, as I participated in the ‘asana’ and ‘pranayama’ sessions, I...

3. LEAD AND FOLLOW – THE BALANCE OF RELATIONSHIPS My dear friends Divya and Shantanu got engaged in a simple and beautiful ceremony at the Bihar School of Yoga. They have been my fellow travelers for the past four years and it was very special for me to be there for this lovely event. Sw. Nirajan spoke briefly about relationships. One point struck home – Successful relationships are not those where there is “50/50 but rather when there is 51/49.”  A 50/50 relationship might lead to two strong egos clashing. Instead, for different areas, it is best that one leads while the other follows. Obviously, the lead has to change depending upon the circumstances. This sounds fairly intuitive, but there was something in this simple point that resonated with me. Later on as I thought more about this point, I realized that a ballroom dance is a great metaphor for a relationship. Both partners have to be individually expressive yet be in sync and one person has to indee...

2. EGODECTOMY!!! Swami Sivananda, one of the giants in the resurrection and propagation of yoga as a practical and holistic approach to improve well being, has identified the reduction of one’s ego as the primary way to greater happiness. On my penultimate day at the Rikhia Ashram of the Bihar School of Yoga, the Sanyasin overseeing the ‘seva’ I was assigned to asked me help clean up a particularly messy part of a room.  We started with sorting out old clothes and assorted gadgets and finally came to a box of old shoes- probably 50 assorted pairs. My instructions-dig right in and make two bundles – those that could be salvaged and used and another that were not fit for wear. Have cleaned toilets, washed windows, painted trees, packed clothes, swept and mopped floors while being down on all fours, but there was something about touching many used shoes that rankled. Fortunately, the words I had read about how selfless service manages the ego ca...

A ten day trip took me from hustle and bustle of the Oriental City of Bangkok to the chaos (yet strange sense of calm) of one of India’s holiest cities ‘Banaras’ and finally into the two islands of tranquility of the Bihar Schools of Yoga. An awesome trip with amazing learnings – after all what else is the point of such travels, but to ignite something within that helps one transform to become better and happier!!! So, for the next few days, am sharing some insights (in no particular order).   I write this mainly for myself. If these touch you in any way, that is indeed a bonus and humbling!  1. THE RIVER OF LIFE – NOTHING LIKE LOOKING AT DEATH SO CLOSELY! The Ganga occupies a hallowed place in Hinduism. Banaras, along with Riskhesh/Haridwar are two of the most religious towns on its banks as it traverses from the Himalayas through the plains of North India until finally emptying itself in the Bay of Bengal.   So, there I finally was – on the banks of ...

A short piece I read which resonated with me.... To learn one must make an active commitment not to succumb to   the pathology of cynicism , our flawed self-protection mechanism that readily dismisses anything sincere and true as simplistic or naïve — even if, or precisely because, we know that all real truth and sincerity are simple by virtue of being true and sincere.

The most precious gift that parents can give....their own HAPPINESS One particular point about modern day parenting has particularly bothered me - the incessant desire to provide for the children even at the cost of this own happiness.  Something about this 'sacrifice' grated with me.  Sometimes I feel that I am not self-less enough as I looked around. My gut tells me that it is my duty to provide adequately, but the biggest gift my wife and I can give our daughter is our own happiness. In a great scene from the "Cat on a Hot Tin Roof" Paul Newman and  his father 'Big Daddy' have a powerful moment when they actually discover this in the midst of a long standing and simmering fight between them  This morning, when I came across this lovely quote from the legendary  Thich Nhat Hanh, it felt good.  "I f our parents didn’t love and understand each other, how are we to know what love looks like? … The most precious inheritance that parents...

Yup, I grew up scoffing mindless ritualistic ceremonies. But only recently, have I been open to dig deeper. One such instance was about a week ago.  Eastern traditions are replete with stories of how the gods are invoked during pious religious ceremonies. Seemed incredulous to me! Then, I heard an explanation by  Shantanu Jignasu Dasharath  at such an event last week which gave me a different perspective. Fire tends to play a pivotal role in various ceremonies. The transformative element of fire is celebrated across various cultures. At these events, if one were to consciously cast away all that we don't want into the fire (anger with someone, jealously, regret, laziness, etc), one emerges feeling better, nay feel GREAT. It is this feeling of goodness that attracts like minded good souls/positive energies to us. This seems logical to me. Gratitude for one more important understanding in the fascinating transformative journey!

What's special about these pictures? What makes it more than another family portrait?  Look at the expressions of the folks holding the two bundles of joy!  Amazing how being with innocent brings out the spontaneous joy in us! 

Story: Positivity and Acceptance has to be the Focus in Life if You want to Succeed  smile emoticon If there are two piles, One of Gold and One of Dirt, which one will You Choose? The Gold One. If there is only one pile in which the dirt and gold are mixed, what will you do?  Separate the gold from the dirt and take the gold. Can you do that with yourself? The personality is a combination of both  rubbish and gold. Generally people are affected by the rubbish and ignore the gold. It is for this reason that, despite having so much to give, so much to receive and so many positive qualities within, we identify with the negative. Separating the Negative from the Positive and selecting and Holding onto the Positive is the Purpose of Yoga. It is that Purpose which has to be Fulfilled in Life. When it comes to individual development and perception, the awareness must be deepened in such a way that we are aware of the grime or dirt, the negative, as well as the beautiful, the ...

27/07 9:13 PM] FRIEND: Morale / energy at a low this last week..things not working out work. ….need a good objective review of where my career is. [28/07 9:45 AM] Sanjay rao chaganti: Hi, was thinking of an appropriate response and then this message came through earlier today.  This was his talk at the Bihar School of Yoga which I find myself connected to... [28/07 9:46 AM] Sanjay rao chaganti: Address by His Excellency Dr A.J.P. Abdul Kalam, President of the Republic of India Namaskara, good morning to all of you, to Swami Dharmashakti, Swami Niranjanananda, Swami Satyasangananda and, of course, venerable Swami Sivananda, whom I always cherish in my memory. Friends, what can I tell you? You are in Bihar Yoga Bharati, which creates a beautiful body and mind. I admire the great founders of this organization, and so I would like to thank the Almighty for giving the people of India such a beautiful place in which they can dream, think and transform themselves in...

Interesting 3 questions.....to design our lives....A variant on head, heart and hands.  Life in an Instant By Tony Robbins In all the years I've worked with people, I've found there are three key decisions we make every moment of our lives. If we make these decisions unconsciously, we end up with lives like the majority of people, who tend to be out of shape physically, exhausted emotionally and often bored with or too comfortable in their intimate relationships—not to mention financially stressed. But if you make these decisions consciously, you can literally change your life in an instant! What are the three decisions that determine the quality of your life? That determine whether you feel rich or poor in any given moment? The first one is: Decision 1: What Are You Going to Focus On? In every moment of our lives, there are millions of things we could focus on. We can focus on the things that are happening right here, right now, or on what we want t...