Tillitonse - A Transformational Journey Together

Death came visiting two days ago. This post captures some three reflections related to the visit of this ‘grim reaper.’ 1. ‘Be aware of the negative mind:’ The news of my second cousin Girija passing away was posted in the family’s Whatsapp group around 7am (that’s a while separate post about social media).   Got a call from my brother around 10am asking me to join him on a drive to Valingiman (a six hour drive).       It is interesting that my first reaction was negative. Honestly, while I have known Girija for years, we were not that close. So, to make a 12 hour trek within 24 hours was not appealing.   But over the next hour as I thought more about it, I found the initial knee jerk reaction fading….’ what the heck, why not just go?’ slowly became the refrain. And I did. So glad I did. In the workshops and one on one work that I do, I communicate that the intrinsic nature of the adult mind is ‘limiting.’ Here was a classic examp...

AS I BEGIN A NEW JOURNEY IN ONE ON ONE COACHING, I JOYFULLY EXTEND AN INVITATION TO YOU.... The Invitation “It doesn't interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for, and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart's longing. It doesn't interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for your dream, for the adventure of being alive. It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring your moon. I want to know if you have touched the center of your own sorrow, if you have been opened by life's betrayals or have become shriveled and closed from fear of further pain! I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own, without moving to hide it or fade it, or fix it. I want to know if you can be with joy, mine or your own, if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful, to be realistic, to remembe...

MIND OVER BODY....@ A BUDDHIST MEDITATION CENTER, BURMA Inspired by  Nithya Shanti  I decided to spend a few days at a Buddhist Meditation Centre in Myanmar (Burma) a few weeks ago. Some interesting lessons learnt: 1. One can survive with a lot less food that we think. Our first meal was at 5.30am and then lunch at 10.30am. No solid food after that. A glass of juice at 5pm was the only other 'meal.' 2. The sessions would begin at 4am. We would sit under an individual mosquito net with one instruction – Just watch the breath in an out. Ever so often one could do some ‘walking meditation.’ Suffice to say, my legs and back cried out in pain after a while. Lots to work on!   3. Oh how the mind can be trained and how it wanders – I got to the Centre on a Friday and was scheduled to leave on Monday morning. All through Saturday, I was focused on the reason I was there – Meditation. But on Sunday, I found my concentration wavering quite a bit as I started th...

"NOW THAT I AM WISER...." LESSONS IN THE TRANSFORMATIVE PROCESS Last week I began a wonderful new journey. I thought I had signed up to become a leadership coach, but as it turns out, the most important step is simply to become a better me. I had known the above saying for a while, but the past week this sunk in more so. The program I have signed up for is called ‘Coaching for Transformation.’ I loved the discussion on how we, the ‘coaches,’ need to embody the appropriate values first and foremost. Only then can we emanate and create a positive and nurturing environment for our clients to undergo a transformation. What a wonderfully empowering sentiment – to be wise is to focus on changing oneself. Gratitude!

WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM MY FRIENDS…… Change is hard…..even when we want to. Yesterday, I was once again reminded about the value of surrounding oneself with like minded people while on this transformational journey. Sanskrit has a lovely word ‘Satsang’ which captures this sentiment ever so beautifully. ‘Sat’ means truth and ‘sang’ (pronounced ‘sung’) means association. In other words, the ‘association with truth (like minded people)’ is strongly recommended as an importance ingredient for any personal transformation. Two beautiful instances yesterday. First, I was invited to interact with a group of   very successful women entrepreneurs. These eight women from very diverse fields have on their own formed a group with one single objective – to create an enabling and conducive environment where they are able to have open conversations with each other on their work related challenges and explore solutions together. They meet every month at a fixed time and venue. ...

DRAUPADI BOOM….suddenly she was there…out of the blue….DRAUPADI……the name hit me, nay shook me! And in that instant, I knew I had to change…. (IF YOU ARE NOT FAMILIAR WITH THE ‘MAHABHARATHA,’   THEN THIS POST MIGHT NOT RESONATE) On the occasion of International Women’s Day earlier this week, I was holding an open interactive session on ‘Infusing Positivity.’ I had an outline of the structure of the session, and although I have given many talks on this subject, this time it felt different. I felt unsettled. Overall, I was not happy with the flow. Something was missing. After trying to find this missing piece the previous night, I gave up. Went to sleep hoping that I would have clarity the next morning. No luck. But then, barely 75 minutes before the session, I was jolted. Draupadi! This was the closest of a ‘Eureka’ moment I have ever had. And in the flash, I had found the anchor of my presentation. In fact, a lot more than the anchor, it was almost as if the ess...

A few months ago I completed a psychometric assessment that included people giving feedback about me. One particular feedback struck a chord – “Sanjay tends to quickly create an image of a person and then does not change it over the years even though the person might have changed.” My first reaction was one that came from a self-preservation mindset….but then it slowly sank in. Could this be true? I just let it lie until now….Over the past few weeks, as I have has more of a chance to observe myself (and others), I realized this was indeed the case. The image of people created either early in life or strong negative reactions upon the first few meetings with anyone seem to have created dvery strong images. Not surprisingly, given the nature of the mind, these images are mainly negative. For instance, there is a particular person who most of those close to me did not like much. Lets call this person Rao. Now Rao in the 1980s exhibited a miserly trait on quite a few occas...